Sunday, March 1, 2009

Serenity's Story Part 14 - Another Surgery..Another Opportunity

Two days later, we noticed that Serenity was having a hard time breathing again. After examining her, the doctor declared that during her surgery the nerve the controls the function of one of her diaphragm muscles had been severed. They were going to have to go in and tie that muscle down.

They were able to get her in right away. The surgery went very smooth and very quickly. However, afterward they explained to us that this procedure was a lot more painful. Unlike the last time, They had to cut through several layers of muscle and when that tissue tries to heal it can sometimes be excruciating.

We were very leery of having to give Serenity more pain medication. We did not want her to have to go through withdrawals again. However, all it took was Reni crying hysterically and looking up at me with her eyes full of pain as if saying, "Help me Mommy."

There is nothing worse than watching your child suffer. Mommies are supposed to be able to kiss those boo boos away. We decided pain medication was the best thing for now.
Our family and the day shift nurse, spent the entire day figuring out a system to help manage Serenity's pain. After talking with the resident doctor we decided that for the first 24 hours the pain was going to be unavoidable. It was better to just go ahead and set up a schedule to automatically give her medication to avoid the pain from becoming unbearable. Then the following day we would return to giving it only as needed. This, we thought made A lot of sense.

The resident doctor also told us, right before she left that Serenity would probably not be too interested in eating and not to be concerned about it. I mean, she had just gone through a second major surgery in just a few days and was in a tremendous amount of pain. Who would want to eat, right? Another, well Duh!

Evidently, the night shift nurse was either not informed or did not agree with our logic. From the time she came in she was giving us attitude, making me believe that maybe she was just having a bad day. Regardless of the reasons, it still affected my daughter.

Once Serenity started to wake up and get a little fussy, I looked up at the clock and noticed that it was time for her scheduled pain meds. I called the front desk and asked them to tell our nurse. By the time she arrived, an hour later, I had already settled Reni down.

I told the nurse it was time for pain meds and very hatefully she replied, "She's asleep." I answered her by I saying, "I know she's not in unbearable pain right now. But why should we wait to get in under control when we know that it's going to get that way? I'm concerned that it may get to the point of excruciating before we do something about it. I do not want my daughter to suffer if she doesn't have to"

I then continued to explain to her the day we had and the plan that we had set up. She scuffed, then stomped out of the room to retrieve the medication.

A few hours later, Reni woke up and again started to get fussy. Again, I called to the nurse and again she took her sweet little time getting there. By the time she arrived Reni was in A lot of pain. I had been rocking her and trying to soothe her. But the nurse wasn't about to admit that she might have been wrong. Instead she pointed the finger at me and said, "Has she eaten tonight?"

If it wasn't for my Christian beliefs I would have jumped right up out of that chair and KNOCKED her OUT! I said, "No she has not eaten, She is IN PAIN." She scuffed again. "Well maybe you should try feeding her!"

I took a deep breath...realizing that this was the woman in charge of the well being of my daughter. If there was one thing I did not want to do, it was make her mad. So I bit my tongue and reached out to God for help with my anger.

I answered. "Anyone who has every breast fed a baby knows that when they are hungry, they root. They practically eat you up alive, trying to find that nipple. I have been rocking her pressing her right up against my chest all night long and she has not one time tried to root, but...(deep breath) I will try to feed her."

She left the room and my heart cried out to God. I sat there watching my baby cry, knowing that she was in pain and knowing there was nothing that I could do. It was about all that I could handle.

Once again I called out to God for help. "Lord, please help my baby! I know that you are a God that loves us. You don't want her to hurt either! Please Lord. You suffered so that Reni wouldn't have to. Take away this pain!!!"

I immediately felt like I needed to anoint her. However, I also remembered my anointing oil was tucked safely away in our hotel room. God brought back to my remembrance the story of Jesus healing the blind man. Jesus spat on the ground then made clay and anointed the mans eyes with it.

Then within my spirit I heard, "Spit."

Wow, wait a minute now, I thought.

Anyone that knows me, knows I am a girlie girl. I do not spit nor would I ever think about doing it on my daughter.

Then I heard, "I am within you therefore what is in you is anointed of me, Now Spit."

"Yes Lord."

I spit into my hands and anointed my daughter saying "By the authority I have through Christ, Pain Be Gone!"

Almost instantly she stopped crying. After that I was able to rock her to sleep.

The next morning my husband went to the head nurse and simply stated that we did not want that particular nurse to care for our child. He did not go into detail, because we were giving her the benefit of the doubt that maybe she was just having a really bad day. Besides, God had taken care of our baby despite her failure.

However, somehow our request got back to her and she went into defense overload… Stating that I was trying to give my baby pain meds when she didn't need them because I didn't want to feed her.

When we heard this, we actually laughed. It was so far from the truth that it was actually very funny. I have been breastfeeding for 10 years now. Every time I get pregnant with one child, I am still nursing the previous child. I have endured engorgement, sore bleeding nipples, bite marks, and Mastitis five different times, all so that my children could have the best possible nourishment. I have never been accused of not wanting to feed my babies.

Regardless of the truth, the damage of her word had already been made. Giving her the benefit of the doubt and not explaining our side of the story first, had come back to bite us. The entire staff believed her story and because of it, the surgeon now wanted to monitor Serenity's food intake. We really were not angry. The doctor didn't know us and he was just trying to insure our baby's well being. We went along with a cheerful heart.

You see, when you are on the brink of a miracle, Satan will come at you with everything he can to bring confusion, strife, or doubt. He wants you to lose your focus on the prize, for where these things are, God can not move in the situation. We have to be very careful of the way we handle circumstances.

The next day, Serenity refused to take the bottle, (she wanted mommy's nipple) They threaten to put a feeding tube back in and we did not want anymore tubes. Instead we came up with the idea of syringing it into her mouth. Day and night we syringed and syringed until finally she threw up and the new nurse told us to stop because we were OVERfeeding her. :)

Added information:

A couple of things here. First... God used this surgery once again as a way of teaching us to rely completely on Him. Pain medications are in fact effective and Praise God for the knowledge of them. However, God is always our source. He can use anything to bring about His comfort or healing.

Second.. God brought forth to me a mighty revelation. We saw two or three different nurses a day for months and only had the very best experiences ...until this moment. This particular nurse was in our lives for a purpose!
When our patience is tried with people...not only is He watching to see how WE will handle the situation..but He is also watching to see if His love is abundant enough in us to have compassion for those trying to hurt us.
Every person who acts in an ungodly manner does so for a reason. Their hearts are filled with hurt...bitterness...depression...They ALL have a reason. I may not know their reason...but I do know one thing....They ALL NEED Jesus!
No one crosses our path without purpose. God allows people in our lives so that He might intervene in theirs. Prayer Changes things! All the people who try to bring hurt, discord, strife...They are all opportunities for prayer. They are all opportunities for us to make a difference...For God to make a change!
I pray for this nurse. I pray that whatever problem she is facing that somehow steals her joy...God will move mightily and His name will be glorified in her life! I pray she comes to know a Savior who loves her unconditionally. A Savior who offers hope and victory in all aspects of her life! I pray for a spiritual walk so deep that His love would shine through her eyes brightly and touch all those she comes into contact with. I pray her patients not see her...but see Christ within her!